I finished another Tai Chi class the other day. Slow movements. Controlled breathing. Uncomfortable postures that rewire your mind and body. Think Karate Kid standing on the peer at the beach. The kind of practice that reminds you that our true power and energy live inside our own stillness.
After my lesson, I saw that, two doors down, was a Muay Thai kickboxing gym.
I’ve been kickboxing since I was in my 20’s. Curiosity got the better of me. Passionate about the martial arts, I walked in and watched for a few minutes while they were sparring.
After they were done, the instructor walked over and introduced himself.
“Hi, I’m Alex, one of the trainers here,” breathing heavily after getting punched and kicked (with padding on) for the last 30 minutes. Good guy. Friendly. Positive disposition.
He started the conversation by talking about what they do, their style, class structure, that the owners were MMA fighters, and the process of onboarding a new member.
While we were talking, Alex said something that would change the tide of the conversation from Muay Thai to coaching.
“We actually have people your age who train here. There’s a guy in his 60’s who comes every week. He doesn’t keep up with the younger guys, but he holds his own.”
I looked at him and smiled. Alex just made one of the most common sales mistakes that destroy sales, (and the realization that I no longer look like I did when I was in my 20’s 
)
“Alex,” I said, “you might want to work on your sales pitch, buddy.”
He looked at me with confusion. “All he had to answer was a, “Huh?” not quite grasping my intent, humor, and sarcasm yet.
My coaching DNA kicked in, and I asked permission to share the following feedback.
He judged before he assessed. He saw a new customer and sale before he saw the person. Age became the filter of facts. Ability and opportunity never got the chance.
We look at someone and quietly make judgements about the type of person they are, what they need, can or cannot do, buy, afford, their experiences, abilities, decision making power, challenges and goals, before asking a single meaningful question.
And this happens in our daily experiences and interactions with others as we instantly size them up in a box. In sales, leadership, individual potential, employees, ability, hiring, how successful they are, and of course, in life.
Here’s why salespeople lose the majority of sales.
Assumptions replace curiosity. Judgment replaces discovery and questions. Facts are formulated in our heads, rather than confirmed.
Great salespeople do the opposite. They assess and ask questions, not assume what they think is true. They treat every person and experience as unique, not compartmentalized.
They learn who is actually standing in front of them. Because the moment you assume, you shrink the opportunity to sell.
Alex never asked three of the simplest but most important questions.
- Can you share your experience around kickboxing and Muay Thai?
- How familiar are you with our program, and this style of fighting?
- What kind of experience and results are you looking for?
If he had, the conversation would have gone very differently.
Now, the story does not end here… Let’s just say after my first session this week, Alex may be learning a few things himself. 
Stay tuned for more life lessons from my Tai Chi classes in upcoming posts.
The post What a Muay Thai Coach Accidently Learned About Sales first appeared on Keith Rosen.